The Anticipator

If I were to have a superpower name, describing how I assist my fellow humans, it could very well be, The Anticipator.

Obviously, my gift is to anticipate what may be needed in any given moment, as well as my tendency to prepare ahead for whatever that case may be.

My anticipating was used well when I was a nurse. Having the instrument in my hand ready to slap into the palm of the surgeon before he even asked for it, helped the operation go smoothly and efficiently.

Other ways I anticipate are by keeping my pantry stocked with any of the items I may need to prepare a meal. I have a nice selection of ingredients and seasonings on hand for most recipes that I may choose to prepare.

I pack my suitcase for a trip, anticipating any kind of weather or activity that may require special clothing or shoes.

I have a well stocked first aid kit in my car and my home, just in case someone near me may need some assistance.

I love to anticipate ahead when planning a party or some other special event. It's fun to picture what is about to happen and then create an environment, and/or whatever may be needed to help it be successful.

Anticipating and then acting on it gives me a sense of satisfaction. It's fun to predict possibilities and then later to experience ease in the moment because I successfully anticipated.

It seems, however, I have met my match in the realm of anticipation. My son leaves for Afghanistan in six days. It is impossible to anticipate what that experience will be like for any of us at home or for my son. Right now I am in a state of peaceful acceptance of the unknown and hope this feeling of peace will continue for his entire time overseas.

Perhaps I have been anticipating this unexpected event (without even knowing it) by practicing peaceful acceptance and calmly responding to the things of life that have shown up on my path prior to this current situation.

Actually to look at life in general we can never fully anticipate what is to come. We do, however, always have the ability and the opportunity to be prepared simply by being open and accepting of what we cannot change and then trusting we can handle whatever occurs.

Coasting Uphill

On a hilly walk this morning, I found myself traversing hill and dale, while enjoying the feel of coasting when walking downhill. I looked forward to those stretches where I could relax and enjoy the breeze. It was almost like shifting my inner gear to neutral and just letting myself go. It was easy, effortless and even more importantly, I enjoyed it.

As I approached the next hill to climb up ahead, I thought I would play with the concept of coasting uphill. I know my mind is powerful in creating experiences, so why not this one?

When I reached the point where the ground changed from level to an ascent, I held on to a feeling of lightness. Yes, my legs worked more that they did on the level or downhill coasting, but somehow my mind maintained the ease of a coast.

The breeze that I felt when coasting downhill, was still present. The sky was the same beautiful blue. All that changed was the level of the earth beneath my feet. My sense of lightness and ease was the same in my uphill coast as it was in the downhill coast.

I was thrilled with my little experiment as I reached the peak and found myself not depleted. In fact, I was energized knowing that I can duplicate uphill coasting in my life. Why not face the things I dread with the same perspective? I know I will eventually accomplish it, so why not just coast?

My personal, self directed assignment (feel free to join me) is to allow myself to do what needs to be done, knowing I will complete it and allowing it to feel like coasting. Will this task require some conscious remembering? Yes! Will it require more physical energy, time, commitment than the down hill tasks that I do every day? Maybe....perhaps when I master coasting uphill, I will accomplish more with less effort because I enjoy it more.

Love Lessons

We humans often struggle with the concept of love.....giving it and receiving it.

Sometimes we expect it to be proven with the use of words, gifts or actions. Sometimes even then, we doubt love can be present, because we don't believe we're lovable.

For many of us, we believe we can only love those that are like us and share the same ideas and opinions about life, or look a certain way. Our capacity for love is sometimes limited to those that share the same skin color, ethnicity or religion.

We can't imagine anyone loving us unconditionally. Surely, we must earn love.

These human ideas are obviously limiting, although I know without question, true love does not have limits...it's universal and unconditional, just watch the way a dog loves his human.

Dogs love freely, without rules. They express their love for humans without limit and without specific cause or condition. Dogs are not embarrassed to express their love....they lick your face, wag their tails and may even try to dance with you.

Dogs do not judge your lovableness by how much you accomplished in your life, or for your race or sexual orientation. They don't assess their degree of love by how many mistakes you've made in your past. It doesn't matter how much money you have or where you live, or what promises you make about the future.

Dogs love freely because they don't analyze it. They do not judge. The dog's lesson on love is that it is simple, uncomplicated, forgiving and complete. No questions... no conditions...just a complete sense of connection that will last forever.

They also freely accept love from anyone willing and open enough to give it. They love because it feels good. They know love is natural and they're not afraid to feel it.

The View From Here

Early this morning, my husband and I took off for a 6 mile trek that took us by several beautiful vistas as we climbed the hills outside of town. As we paused to take in one particularly breath taking scene of rolling hills, green pastures and wild flowers covering the landscape, the question, "What is your view from here?" came to my mind.

With that inquiry came the awareness that it is the same question we can ask ourselves in every moment with whatever it may be that is in our sights. In other words, our view of life and of whatever may be on our plate (both the delectable and the unsavory) will appear to be different depending on our view. The only view that matters, is the view from where you are here and NOW.

If we are attempting to assess a current situation based on our fear of the future or our regrets of the past, our experience will be skewed. We cannot possibly predict how we will feel, or what we will do at sometime in the future, because we are not there yet. Between now and then countless experiences will have occurred which may quite likely affect our opinion and sensibilities later.

By the same token, if we make decisions based solely on anger, judgments, fears or regrets that developed due to past experiences, and are not allowing ourselves to learn and grow from these past experiences, we are cutting ourselves off from the wisdom of NOW.

The View From Here is what you see, feel, taste and intuit NOW. When I experience life from this moment (my current view), I cannot help but feel joyful. My logical and calculating mind will be put on pause, so my inner wisdom can take in the view.

With all judgments and fears put to rest (since they only exist in our views of the past or the future), peace and joy will be the landscape I will see.

Diary of Addiction

Yesterday I came to grips and admitted an addiction. After eating 15 ounces of Swedish fish in a twenty four hour period and then noticing I was not happier as a result of my binge, I can admit my desire for the sweet, red gummy-like fish can consume me. I believe it qualifies as an addiction.

I always liked any gummy candy, but Swedish fish are my number one favorite. My 91 year old Mom likes them too. In fact, the bag of candy I so decadently consumed was actually purchased for her (something I'm not proud of). In a weak, sugar craving moment which occurred after weighing myself and learning I had just lost another two pounds, (the fear of weight gain was absent) I succumbed to my craving and went fishing for a treat.

When I decided to open the bag and made a promise to myself to buy another for my mother, I told myself I can have just a few and then put the bag away. Well, that is exactly what I did....although I repeatedly reopened the bag and ate my fish in schools of five over the course of the whole day and into the next.

When the last fish was consumed, I began to think about the experience I just completed. First of all imagining a gummy wad in my stomach that will probably take weeks to digest did not feel good. I can honestly say after the first few fish went down the hatch, I did not fully enjoy the treat. In fact, it seemed the more I ate, the less I tasted them and the less control I seemed to have. Before long, the fish were eating me, not me eating them.

This incident had all the markings of addiction. I could not control myself after awhile. The fish were all I could think about. I told myself I had self-control, but yet I gave into this craving. It became very clear that the sweet cherry taste of Swedish fish is not more important to me than being in control of my own actions.

I realize addictions to alcohol, tobacco and drugs carry with them other elements that make them even more self destructive than my love of Swedish fish, but believe the bottom line of whether or not eating, drinking, smoking or using a chemical substance actually improves your quality of life, the answer seems clear to me. External influences can never replace the contentment that comes from within. I temporarily forgot that.

Since I choose to live my best life, I want to remember to make decisions that support that goal. Asking myself how what I am about to do will feel, and whether or not it is in alignment with who I am is a great place to begin. If it is in alignment, I feel joy.

If I had listened to my intuition, I would have walked away from the fish. Next time, I will remember this experience and make another choice that will actually feel good to swallow.

Why Would I Do That?

I'm happy much of the time, because I like how it feels. I do things I love because it's fulfilling. I hang around people that move me in some way, because I enjoy connection. I especially love to laugh, so I do things that are fun and playful. I work with clients that I enjoy. I speak on topics that get me excited.

One thing I don't do is worry. I saw a quote this morning about worry that grabbed my attention in the moment and stuck with me all day ......"Worrying is using your imagination to create something you don't want". Why would I do that?

This is so simple and eloquent in it's simplicity. When we worry, we are fabricating a scary story in our minds. If we are in a state of worry, then that means the story we're telling our self is not a happy one. It is surely not one that exemplifies hope or a positive outcome. In worry situations, we use our fantastic imaginations to create one or more frightening scenarios of what could possibly 'go wrong'. Before long, we are believing in our own story and then worry it may come true. As we build on worry that sprouts like weeds in a spring garden, it can soon overcome us. Any sense of peace, calm, happiness, and especially joy, are dashed.

You may be thinking that if you tell yourself a "happy story" rather than a "worry story", you may not be prepared for the imagined disaster. Since we never know for sure, exactly what will happen next, I subscribe to the belief that the better I am feeling in any given moment, the better I can deal with whatever happens next. Feel free to quote me on that.

One more piece to this simple equation is if you ascribe to the power of attraction then your negative, scary, made up worry story will actually attract that which you don't want.

Even if you don't believe you create your own experience in life, worry will never feel good. Since that is true, why do it?

Celebrate or Berate

Today is my husband's birthday and I am very pleased to see him seizing the day as one to celebrate, not one to ignore.

It's puzzling to me why it seems to be universally acceptable to celebrate and not berate the birthday boy or girl when we're children, but after a certain age, which can vary depending on what we consider being "too old", many of us begin to dread being reminded we have lived another year. We give cards that tease about being 'over the hill', we make derogatory jokes about age and for many of us, just hope it will all pass quickly, so we can go back to living our lives unnoticed until the next year.

Perhaps if we more consciously and sincerely celebrated aging, we would naturally be paying more respect to those that have lived the longest. We would look forward to being older rather than longing for our lost youth.

I encourage you to truly celebrate your birthdays, since the longer we're around the more life we get to live.....and that is always a good thing.