Saturday, December 20, 2008

Bewaring of Comparing

My thoughts continued to flow regarding yesterday's post on confidence. In my experience one of the top five killers of confidence is comparing.

It's sometimes hard to resist comparing ourselves to others. We take in the appearance, the accomplishments, the gifts and skills of others we admire and then compare ourselves to see how we measure up. Many of those to whom we compare ourselves seem to be more attractive, smarter, more talented and more gifted, which then may cause us to try to be more like them.

I've learned from personal experience trying is my death. As soon as I try to be like someone else or to match some picture I have in my head of what I should be like, I lose myself. What I mean by that is I lose my own attractiveness, my own talents, gifts, and along with all of that, my confidence and my authenticity.

Those of you who have also dared to compare yourself probably agree with me that we are not at our best when we are putting ourselves in a position that jeopardizes our natural and authentic being. It isn't fun and it doesn't make sense.

The alternative to comparing is owning. Owning your own strengths, gifts and talents. Embracing all that is true about you without trying to hold yourself up to someone else. There's no work involved....just being.

Now that I am tuned in to not comparing, I'm naturally happier. I'm better able to live my life with joy and to serve in the ways that best suit me. I can now simply be my best....without looking over my shoulder to see how I compare.

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