Wednesday, May 6, 2009

The View

I am frequently entertained by the countless views or perspectives we humans can have. What is particularly amusing is that we typically see our personal perspectives as being "right". Of course that would be the case, since we believe we know all there is to know and have come to the conclusion as to what is "right" based on the obvious....that is, what is going on in our minds.

The truth is when looking at many situations, there are numerous perspectives that can be "right". The stretch for us is to open our minds enough so we can consider another answer, solution, viewpoint etc. Many times when we have strongly attached ourselves to a position or opinion, we don't know all there is to know and we fear letting go of our idea. Typically, if there is more than one person involved, there will be at least that many different views on the subject.

When more than one view is present, there may be a collision....In the defense of our view someone may be hurt....something may be spoken from a defensive stance that creates a mess, hurt feelings, stress, anxiety and even separation. Naturally when each person then looks at the mess, a new view is created about that newly created situation, and on it goes.

To be able to live peacefully, it seems to make sense to not hold too tightly to our own personal view. Being curious about the perspective someone else holds may open our minds to a whole new way of seeing things. Being open to a different view, not only helps relationships, it deepens our understanding about the connection we all share while having unique ways of seeing the world.

My goal is not to have to be right. I once heard author/speaker, Wayne Dyer, say if you have the choice to be kind or be right, choose kind. I take that as sound advice, since being kind means peace and that is really what I want.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Toot of the Horn

Many people I talk to are reluctant to acknowledge their gifts or skills. They believe that if they claim their gifts that it would be like tooting their own horn. I say "Why not?" The toot of the horn is primarily for your benefit. It grabs your attention and says "Wake up", use your gifts and be grateful for them.

Why not toot your horn, if it means you are even more closely knowing the truth about you? I'm not suggesting it's healthy for one to go around telling everyone they see what a great singer, dancer, or athlete they are. That doesn't make sense and would be more about looking for validation from someone else than it would about simply knowing the truth and feeling confident in sharing your gifts.

If we aren't truly knowing and owning our gifts, we can't fully use them. It just doesn't make sense otherwise. Owning means being able to think or even speak the truth about you, without embarrassment or minimizing.

Yesterday I was completing a form for a marketing company I hired, that asked me to list my strengths. As I began the list, I noticed it felt good to type out the words, neatly aligned with bullets preceding them. As my list lengthened, I noticed I felt better and better. When I really gave some focused thought about my strengths, I discovered some things came to mind that I hadn't thought much about before. When I was finished, I thought "the people that hire me are going to really be pleased with what they get".

I laughed when I thought about how silly it would be for me to hesitate in writing the list. What good would it serve? I wasn't comparing myself to any other individual, I was simply describing what a client would receive if they hired me. If I didn't believe it, why should they? If I don't believe it, how can I fully share my gifts with those around me?

So, I say toot your horn! Toot it as much as you'd like. The toot of your horn is not meant to make someone get out of your way, but to let them know you're near by and ready to serve.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Fearless Dreaming

I am a dreamer. I dream while awake and when I sleep. I had a couple of dreams in the last week or so that one would expect would be very frightening, and possibly even qualify as nightmares. I was pleased to awaken from these dreams noticing I had no fear as the stories unfolded.

The first fearless dreaming episode was a situation where I was working as a civilian CIA agent ( similar to the T.V. show, Chuck). I was in a very dangerous position with the "bad guys" chasing me. I didn't have a gun, only my wits.....that alone should have scared me. As I ran, hid, and swung from curtains, I noticed in the dream, I had no fear....not one little bit. It was almost as if I knew it was a dream and I could not be harmed.

In another dream a few nights later, I was in my home, which was bigger and higher than it really is, with walls of windows. As I looked out the back, I saw thousands of people gathered for a party I was having. For a moment, I had concern about only having two bathrooms, and that I really should have ordered some port-a-potties. When I turned my head and looked out the side window, I saw a million black birds sweep across the sky. I was amazed at the site and unafraid, even though the movie The Birds kept me ducking for years when I saw a black bird. The apparent reason for this swarm of birds was that they were being chased by a tornado. Instead of running for cover, I stood and watched as it came closer, amazed at this force of nature. Just as the tornado was about to touch on my house, it fizzled out.

I was very pleased when I awoke from both dreams that I was able to meet the situations fearlessly since that is just how I want to be living my life. For me to live in a fearless state, I work on remembering that life is like a dream too. Ultimately, I cannot be harmed. My body can be, but the spirit of me is forever safe.

I realize I have a lot of practice to do in making this concept really stick since sometimes my awake dreams of living the life I want make me gasp in fear of how big life can be.

I don't know about you, but I'm willing to allow my dreams to recur, reminding me that life will always be as big, and as grand, and joy-filled as I allow it to be .